So I am socially required to shave my legs and armpits but white boys aren’t socially required to shave their stringy greasy failed mini moustaches?
do you ever roll up your sleeves to wash your hands and one of the sleeves starts slipping down like its attracted to the water and all you can think is “dont you fucking dare”
no but seriously what if zayn malik could act
#i’m just going to bring this back #because malinna ruins lives #just the thought#zayn malik as a tortured romantic poet in search of his next muse #zayn malik as a demi-god #zayn malik as a hustler who uses his pretty face to fleece rich white people of their money #maybe he kills them too. who knows. i don’t care. #zayn malik as an angst-ridden reluctant superhero whose main superpower is destroying evil with his pretty lashes #zayn malik an acerbic english student stuck in some pretentious liberal arts institution who has a doomed affair with a professor #zayn malik a disenchanted unemployed twenty something who embarks on a roadtrip across europe to find himself #and has plenty of adventures; falls in love thrice; and writes a novel along the way #zayn malik an unsuccessful torch singer who sells his soul to the devil to gain the world but finds success tastes acrid as ash #zayn malik as a young street racer in fatf 15 who desperately wants to prove himself and make enough money to support his family #or something #zayn malik as jesus. or judas. in love with jesus. zayn malik as a crossdressing mary magdalene. #zayn malik as a 14th century saint who finds god through an intense hypersexual affair with a nun#zayn malik zayn malik zayn malik for everything #give it to me universe #zayn malik #i got 99 problems and this kid is 98 of them #oh and zayn malik as an alien sent to earth from his dying planet learning to fit in with a decidedly unattractive human race #navigating the treacherous waters of high school or university whatever #zayn malik young professional who realises there’s something deeply wrong with the world and destroys the matrix #zayn malik man out of time #zayn malik doomed lover reincarnated time and time again to love the same person only to lose them
me first day of the semester: I’M GONNA GET AN A!!!!! I BETTER ORGANIZE MY NOTES!!!! I’M WRITING THIS IN MY PLANNER!!!! THIS IS SO COOL!!!!! I’M SETTING MY ALARM 30 MINUTES EARLY
me the night before finals week: SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT shit shit shit shit shit shit shit… shit… sh…. ss.ss….. ..i don’t care haha
For years there’s been rainstorms obstructing the clarity of Deadpool’s sexuality but last night the skies cleared when current author Gerry Duggan confirmed Deadpool’s pansexuality on twitter.
young adult things: washing your colors with your whites because you don’t care you JUST don’t fucking care