"how can you drink hot coffee in the middle of summer?"

fire cannot kill a dragon

can u write like a mr and mrs smith au plsss (asked by supersoldiers)


"I never told you before, but I was married once."

Steve pauses in where he’s trying to shoot the tires out of one of the vehicles that have been following them for half an hour now, and then says, “Okay.”

He blows out one of the guy’s tires, and the car spins before crashing into a car and then exploding. Steve starts aiming at the next van following them.

"It was a drunken Vegas thing," Tony says, twisting the steering wheel and laying on the horn so most of the people get out of the way. The ones that don’t get shoved out of the lane by their SUV. "It meant nothing."

"Yeah, thanks, that makes it better," Steve snaps, managing to shoot the man in the passenger’s seat through the head. "What’s her name and social security number?"

"You’re not going to kill her," Tony says, keeping his eyes on the road as they argue.

"I can’t believe I took my actual mother to our wedding," Steve snarls, and groans when another two of his bullets hit the road ineffectively as the van swerves.

Tony glances at him and says, “You took out the blue one?”

"Yes, no thanks to your driving-"

"I can deal with the other one, I caught up with it earlier," Tony says, and digs something out of his pocket before pressing the button.

The last van behind them explodes, sending cars around it veering in different directions.

Steve checks to see if anyone else is following them before leaning back into his seat and winding the window up. “You put an explosive in their car when we were fighting them before.”

"I did."

"I am uncomfortably turned on right now," Steve says, and Tony grins at him as they turn onto the highway.

for cauthons (happy birthday!) [edit: quote]

The Prince of Egypt songs (in order of appearance).


why am i so emotionally dependent on the relationship between two fictional 95 yr old super soldiers


Part 2 of Avengers Sitcom episode “word puzzles with a restless narcissist”, also known as “we’re gonna need an intervention” (/almost sorry)


make me choose: rosa diaz or gina linetti (asked by steve-carell)